A brick could be used to describe somebody hard and inflexible, and a blanket could be used to describe somebody warm and easygoing.


“A preacher’s job is preaching. So how come he gets to work on the day of rest?”

“I drink sleep, but not like I drink coffee. I chug one and sip the other.”

“If I asked people how many people there are in the world, I’ll bet more than ha…”

“I am not a professionally trained professional. I am an amateur professional!”