All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those who have had to live.

“Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived…”

“Yes, I am of old family, and not illiterate. I am a fossil."   "A which?"   "Fo…”

“Don't use a five-dollar word when a fifty-cent word will do.”

“There's one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you kn…”