Attorney ethics is a contradiction in terms, and its nonexistence is well documented.

“My advice is to write in the nude. Unless you do your writing in a public restr…”

“I stepped on a banana spider today. I didn't crush it, but I did slip and fall.…”

“I’ll let you see the door is open, so you know I’m open to the idea that you ca…”

“Two days ago, Tuesday at 10:10 am, I gave birth to a bagel. And God commanded m…”