Bah, Alzheimer’s. Grandma wouldn’t be so forgetful if she didn’t always have dick on her mind.

“Is there a word halfway between hello and goodbye? Because that’s the word my s…”

“I wanted a ponytail for my 16th birthday, but daddy never bought me one. He tho…”

“When someone tells me they don’t read, I like to walk up to them and stroke the…”

“I am in possession of the love cannon. Please don’t take this the wrong way, bu…”