Before you enter politics, I pray you lose your anal virginity to a unicorn.

“Due to state laws, the restaurant was nonsmoking, which as a nonsmoker pleases …”

“Of all the flowers from a rose to a carnation, I’d die for reincarnation.”

“He doesn’t have sex with sheep—he sleeps with scapegoats. He is my father, and …”

“A blanket could be used for a soft opening of a new casino. The softer the bett…”