Drive, guy. That green light isn’t going to get a deeper green. It’ll only ripen and turn yellow.

“I don’t understand people who eat Chinese food with chopsticks when the restaur…”

“After the first meal with a new girlfriend’s family, I always like to say, “Wil…”

“A half-truth is 90% of the story. The other 10% is tithed to God.”

“I have so many pet peeves that I can’t even pet them all. And damn I wish they …”