Fear is healthy. I wish it came in a pill. I'd bottle it up and sell it to little children and the elderly.

“I’m not a good liar, and that makes me a good liar, because liars are bad, and …”

“Trying to define love is like trying to catch a ghost named Brita in a glass of…”

“Love is like building a wall with two bricks and a ton of wind. Obviously you a…”

“This morning my girlfriend was so loud in bed that we woke up the neighbors. So…”