I always leave the toilet seat up. It’s just easier to wash my hair that way.

“The list of women he’s slept with is longer than his penis. The list is three i…”

“I’m thinking of changing my name to “Son of Manana.” Of course it isn’t accurat…”

“A brick could be used as a Sexual Orientation Device. But I don’t need it, beca…”

“I wouldn’t see eye to eye with a Cyclops.”