I can run 50 yards faster than I can mow them.

“I tell people she’s a pile of apples, and that I can’t wait to get in cider.”

“Ask my mustache anything you want, and my mouth will answer for it. And after t…”

“The moon looked like melted mozzarella to my bleary and blurry vision. Was I ti…”

“Alone is just another word for love.”