I don’t understand people who don’t touch their pets. Their cat or dog is called a pet for a reason.


“Sometimes I think I know her. This is not one of those times. This is not 3:33.”

“Some of the vitamins I take are the size of jumbo jets, though they only pack a…”

“Get off the scale, and get out of my weigh.”

“From the corner of my eye I saw her. Of course this chance encounter with Rebec…”