I had a religious experience at a crosswalk.

“This financial crisis in Europe would have left Greece in Ruins, but it’s been …”

“Sandwiches come in shrink-wrap—therefore, I must masturbate with gloves on. Lun…”

“Her name is Denise, and she has green eyes and red hair. Well, this week. Last …”

“We made love like oysters, and then we ate oysters. Then we made love like two …”