I had to sell my cigarette boat, for fear it would cause cancer.

“Everyone in the world ages at exactly the same rate and time. We’re all getting…”

“Would you rather have sight, or insight? I’d rather have a double cheeseburger.”

“If politicians lived to be only 30-years-old before dying, that’d still be 30 y…”

“You know cats, always scratching on this or that, but never scratching what you…”