I have so many pet peeves that I can’t even pet them all. And damn I wish they were furry.

“I wrote a coded love note in my report for work. All the letters you need to re…”

“His name was Chase, so to make things interesting, I gave him a bit of a head s…”

“Cats have tongues with the texture of bricks, and fur as warm and soft as blank…”

“On Knowledge: You know that I know you know, but I want you to know that I know…”