I left my youth behind me. It peddled the bicycle while I rode on the handlebars.

“Hellos are ascending in speed, not slowing down like goodbyes. I may say hi as …”

“When I smile, not only do my ears rise, but so does my listening ability. When …”

“Each one of my nostrils is the size of my urethra. Every breath smells like pis…”

“The president spends most of his time playing golf and vacationing. But the tim…”