I like undressing women with my eyes, but I just can’t quite figure out how to unstrap their bras with my eyelids.

“When you pee in the sink, you don’t have to flush. Your hands are also right th…”

“I am mad in love like fire, and I speak sushi after a night of fingernail sandw…”

“I’m asking you not to do it. Can you do that for me? Can you do not doing it?
”

“We had sex by the fireplace. I remember because my waxy nipples started drippin…”