I like when wind works. But in this depression, does anything work? If it’s not unemployed, it’s broken. When I hear the politicians talk, all I hear is them breaking wind through their mouths.

“I don’t know how to say it without saying it, so I’ll just not say it. Or I cou…”

“A zebra has stripes, the American flag has stripes, and I have an erection. Coi…”

“I’m a man who wears many hats. Some of them are furry.”

“Cats like to cuddle more than any other living creature, including zombies, whi…”