I need your help. Hold this water balloon while I pee in it.

“Love is like a cloudless blue sky. That’s why I always carry an open umbrella.”

“If I only had five minutes left to live, I’d only be half as alarmed as normal,…”

“Money, like a person whose first name is Money, shouldn’t be what you spend you…”

“I bought an empty safe, and I keep it empty, because safety doesn’t exist, so m…”