I once had a professor who could condense an entire lecture into a can of frozen orange juice. Talk about hard to concentrate.

“What would people say about me? They would say I’m an enjoyable guy to be aroun…”

“Love walked in the door like a dusty cowboy, and I looked that cowboy dead in h…”

“I remember I laughed so hard I cried. But my response was half appropriate, bec…”

“Sometimes I’ll forget a utensil’s name, and I’ll say, “Give me that pointy thin…”