I once saw a snake having sex with a vulture, and I thought, It’s just business as usual in Washington DC.

“I’m unemployed, so I’m seeking a handjob.”

“It's easy to say I love you, but much harder to show it. Be bold. Be in love—an…”

“I don’t know the man standing next to me in the mirror. He looks like me, so is…”

“I’m a door-to-door salesman. I sell doors. If I can’t knock on yours, because y…”