I put the choir in kissing. Too bad there’s no sing in fornicating. But that doesn’t stop me from hiring a hummer.

“I was in the shower the other day and I noticed on the back of the shampoo bott…”

“When I was in the second grade, I used to think love was the feeling a man gets…”

“A brick could be used to show how patient you are. Somewhere between one brick …”

“A blanket could be used as a scapegoat. But I’d rather use real goats, because …”