I think Gummy Bears should be the universal symbol for peace, because peace leads to prosperity, prosperity leads to decadence, and decadence leads to diabetes.

“I went through and underlined all the funny lines in his book, and by the time …”

“The most the average person probably reads in a day is a STOP sign or two. And …”

“You can have your cake, but you can’t eat it. You have to sit there and watch m…”

“I live in the armpit of the country. I can tell by how hairy and smelly and hil…”