I’d rather have a career that utilizes my creativity, but torturing people all day long is not a bad gig. At least not for me.

“It must be awful to be on a team with a superstar, someone much better than eve…”

“Once the orange juice wears off, I might be drunk. I love vodka.”

“My favorite pen is my penis. Put my words in your mouth.”

“I didn’t have enough money to tip the waitress, so I offered to take her out on…”