If I had an orange penis, and an erection, I might take offense at carrot eaters. Baby carrots.

“I’ve demanded of myself to be more demanding of others.”

“-I’m looking for a man—
-There are several suspects in Topeka, Ks. that match t…”

“I asked the girl at the coffee shop out on a date. Unfortunately she said no, p…”

“My love is as loud as it can be while still being silent. Would you describe ou…”