If I had four fingers growing out of my forehead, I wouldn't try to play the piano with my nose.

“Love is like Atlantis, OK? And I’m just a humble scuba diver searching for trea…”

“I make love like I ride my two-seater unicycle—slowly. If you feel unstable, yo…”

“It was a dumb mistake, sleeping with her, and I learned from the experience. St…”

“If I’m happy, my eyes are chestnut; if I’m surprised, my eyes are hazelnut; if …”