If love were a color, it’d be transparent, like all women’s clothing should be.

“The quickest way to become an interesting person is to show interest in others.”

“To save the environment—and my childhood memories, I merged a gas station pump …”

“I admire from a distance. Too close and the flaws form a craterous landscape an…”

“If a gorgeous woman hits on me right off the bat, I’m suspicious. I wonder what…”