If my love were a bagel, I’d put cream cheese on it. But it’s not a bagel, so I just put cheddar on top. Would you like to try a sample?

“My girlfriend has two aliases. Clones aside, it’s the only time I’ve ever felt …”

“I want to name my son Justin Case. You know, just in case.”

“Taxidermy and taxes go together like peanut butter and sodomy. Can somebody get…”

“I’m not in manufacturing, but I make something. I make a difference. But to be …”