If my voice sounded like a dial tone, people would probably hang up on me all the time.

“If I had no penis, how would I pee? How would I make love? How would I think?”

“Faith: a device of the mind, fed by the soul, that functions like crutches to a…”

“Don’t raise your hand to ask a question, or I’ll give you a surprise high five.”

“Dream headline from Orafouraville Times: Man Let Go By Employer, Falls To Death”