-I’m 60-years-old.

-Ma’am, I don’t believe it.

-You’re too kind.

-It’s true. You look at least 75.

“If rubber bands played basketball, I’d tell them, You have to be better down th…”

“It’s amazing how my whole body can be covered up in bed except for one inch on …”

“They’ll know who the brains of the operation was when they see me smash my clon…”

“I want to grow a flower for every time someone tells me “F*** you.” Then I’ll g…”