I’m a competitor. I once placed fifth in a bottle of whiskey.

“The essence of courage is timing. Take me, for example. I’ll show up to fight a…”

“If I didn’t have any pants on, I’d let you taste my pantslessness.”

“I need to convince John to convince Jim to convince Jason that I don’t need con…”

“For men, money, like sex, is something that nearly everybody wants more of, and…”