I’m ambidextrous. I can write just as poorly with either hand.

“There’s truth and honor in a mustache. And that’s why I started flying one on t…”

“I drink coffee like a civilized man—alone in a cave, wearing a loincloth, and g…”

“A can of canola is better than a can of can’t.”

“A blanket could be used for anti-population-control purposes. Get naked and get…”