I’m not a bicycle. Don’t try to ride me and leave me in the garage. I’m a treadmill. Walk on me and leave me in a guest room.

“I am possibly the world's greatest magician, because I don't just vanish off st…”

“My ex girlfriend and I, we had chemistry together. And right after that, we had…”

“One blanket, coupled with a fluffy pillow, could be implemented as a torture de…”

“Used is to sued, as brick is to Kricb, and that is such a profound observation …”