I’m not opposed to new people, I just don’t like their packaging (diapers).

“Where there’s a winner, there’s a loser, and always at the same time. Occasiona…”

“Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need …”

“Mustaches are so cool that I not only have one—I have two. I wear both of mine …”

“The Frosted Flakes sales team once described me as “Flakey.” I was highly flatt…”