It’s hot as a watermelon in this cantaloupe called pineapple. And that’s a fact.

“I hate when people say primitive people didn’t even have running water. What do…”

“I can scratch “scratch myself” off my list of things to do.”

“I’m a four-time Pulitzer Prize winning admirer. I’m also a 16-time Olympic meda…”

“She loves me. She must, because she left flowers in the fridge from her date. S…”