I’ve got something you can hang your hat on: my erection.

“Farmers grow on the land. I suppose farmers grow farmers, rather than using sex…”

“At my bachelor party I had Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer” play on repeat, while I e…”

“Men lie to get laid, women lie about orgasms, and hermaphrodites lie to themsel…”

“I didn’t call her, but the phone works two ways. So does my love.”