Large metal objects moving at high speeds have such an impact on me that I just get paralyzed. Honk if you’re horny, and find men in wheelchairs sexy.

“I don’t care if you live by the motto: let the chips fall where they may, but d…”

“I’m not a bicycle. Don’t try to ride me and leave me in the garage. I’m a tread…”

“I bought you a gift. It’s something I’ve always wanted, but I’m not quite sure …”

“Cats have tongues with the texture of bricks, and fur as warm and soft as blank…”