Love is tender, like the pot roast I’m keeping warm in my shoes.

“Who needs a large vocabulary when you can just make up any word at any time? It…”

“I get along with everybody. You know this because everybody is a jerk, yet when…”

“A brick could be used to help America make money. Trust me, this is smarter tha…”

“I'm the kind of guy who puts other people first. Particularly if there’s danger…”