Love means the world to me. But so does a globe.


“When I was growing up, I’d walk to school in the snow. In Florida. Uphill all t…”

“I want to get the huge wart that looks like a nose removed from my back, but fi…”

“I need a water/glory mix of 2:1. That’d make me piss like a champion.”

“If I had a clone, I could list myself as a character reference.”