My girlfriend is as reasonable as Lady Justice, and just as blindfolded. She’s tied up in the trunk this very moment.

“I often wonder about lifetime warranties. The lifetime of whom or what? A fly t…”

“Would you rather be affluent, or influential? I’d rather be fluent in the langu…”

“Fight or flight? If I had wings, there’d be no choice. But since I don’t have w…”

“A brick could be put on the end of a scale, to determine if the other end of th…”