My mother-in-law got so angry at me she vowed she’d never speak to me again, and I smiled and gave thanks for the little miracle God worked in my life.

“You know what’s not funny? Funny bones. No, at best they are only mildly amusin…”

“Insects have the most sex. Trust me, I peep on them through my microscope.”

“A shirt is a dress, if you have short enough legs.”

“Poison Ivy tastes like an itch when you have it on your tongue, and I’d say tha…”