My name is Couch Choochoo, and I’m here to train you.

“Pigs might make great pets, but they make better breakfast. I’ll take one big s…”

“I think it would be funny to dye somebody’s pool red and then throw dead fish i…”

“After a few years of not talking, I tried reaching out to my father, but by tha…”

“You are getting a wooden leg for your birthday, and you are going to love it. I…”