My new mustache is barely big enough to cover my pubic region.

“My eyes were blurry from being in love, and my feelings were as furry as Bigfoo…”

“If my last name were Marriagenowsky, and I met another girl with that name, gue…”

“-Good thing you don’t own a mirror, Mr. Mirrorless, or you’d see how ugly you a…”

“I just invented a new light that shuts off automatically when an ugly person wa…”