My wife died of someone trying to help her. He helped her find her way off a bridge and into a chained and locked metal trunk. Then he had the audacity to not accept a coupon when I went to pay him for his services rendered.

“Funerals and weddings often take place in the same location. Some would also ar…”

“I feel like I’m late for love. I’ll be 30 in March. Damn it! I knew I should ha…”

“If I tried to mail our love, it’s irregular shape and unknowable dimensions wou…”

“If my nipples were restart buttons, I’d let you play with my buttocks.”