One clown sleeping in a car is not tragic. One clown sleeping with your wife in his car—tragic. Especially if you’re inside the tent enjoying the circus.

“Whenever I see a gorgeous woman, I think, Who is that tall drink of water, and …”

“She walked by and I said, Nice shirt. What I really meant was, Nice tits.”

“Having kids and making kids are two different hobbies. I don’t have any childre…”

“So I just got a call from the hotel, and they want me to start work tomorrow. I…”