Only cowards never tire of cowering. I try to milk the cower for all it’s worth.

“No matter how far or long you carry it, my love doesn’t weigh a lot. But if you…”

“I bowl like I masturbate: with two hands. I should run for Congress.”

“When I think about my clone, random songs pop into my head. Songs like, “Happy …”

“There were only two of us left for dinner, and that’s when I realized what I wa…”