Participation trophies are junk. If all you have to do is show up, how worthless are they? Unless you’re invisible and deaf, and then one of those trophies would be meaningful, because simply showing up is exactly what is hard for you to do.

“A brick could be a politician, if you attached strings, taught it to dance, and…”

“Question for your life: Let’s say we’re making love on the moon, and my clone d…”

“Who leads the world in consumption? America! Who has more lawyers per capita? A…”

“I took some naked pictures the other day. I don’t feel shamed, but I do feel re…”