Some people work in the medical field, others in the legal field, while I work in the green field. Except in winter, and then I work in the brown field.

“My favorite thing isn’t being the favorite to win—it’s being the underdog.”

“I have just been elected Captain of the Nap Squad. It's a very exhausting posit…”

“When I visit England, I want to bring back the best souvenir an American can ge…”

“Love is like breakfast with Mildred. Who’s Mildred? How the heck should I know?…”