Some things change, and some things stay the same. The things that change are the things that I wish stayed the same, and the things that stay the same are the things I wish changed.

“To wipe her off my mind, I wiped my ass. I felt so free after that I took a shi…”

“The first step to running a successful business, is printing out pictures of al…”

“The idea of adultery is like a soccer ball. Yeah, you might kick it around for …”

“I hate when people say primitive people didn’t even have running water. What do…”