Water is like love, but love is not like water. No, because if it were, I’d be the camel of love.

“A brick could be used as a pillow, if you first wrap it with a blanket. But if …”

“A blanket could be used to separate the winners from the losers. With the excep…”

“My friend Angela, she’s no angel. But my friend Demonica, she’s aptly named.”

“Inappropriate interview question #13: Can I call you Kitten Tits?”