When I wear sunglasses, the day turns shades of night, and it’s as if the blocking of the sun to my eyes cools down my body too.

“I wear my underwear on the outside of my itch.”

“I had a dream about you last night. We started a shoe company, and a competitor…”

“The word "the" is 2/3rds he. I'm not being sexist, merely statistical.”

“If I were among midgets I didn’t know, I’d be afraid they’d see I was uncomfort…”