Whenever I see a strange man at a urinal, I always approach him slowly and say, “Dad, is that you?

“My love is like the collision between a falling statue and still bird poop.”

“A brick could be used as gift for the man who has everything. Here’s a tip: tha…”

“Meet the Robinsoons—but meet them later.”

“A brick could be used to help America make money. Trust me, this is smarter tha…”